Saturday, October 2, 2010


I suspect my extended family is like most other have more in common with some members and less with others....some members you like...and others not so much..........and it isn't static. The dynamics and the relationships change over time as the individuals and the circumstances change.

The extended family can be a place to share the slings and arrows of life (or may be the source of the slings and arrows).

I have been thinking about family, and family dynamics, a lot lately. For the last week both Favourite Daughter and No 1 Son have been away. I had 5 days when I was "home alone" and it felt very strange.
No 1 Son has returned but FD is away until the end of the week so it is still not the usual dynamic.

This week Glenn's younger (and less handsome) brother, his wife, and their kids are in town. Glenn and his brother were very close, and his wife is a friend of mine (from before I knew Glenn). So the relationship between us is a positive one. Perhaps that explains why I find spending time with them a two edged sword. Glenn's absence is like an elephant in the room because he was the prism through which my relationship with them was focused. Perhaps I am like an elephant in the room to them because I was Glenn's wife and the mother of Glenn's children.

So spending time with them is enjoyable but painful because there is now a gaping hole where Glenn once stood and their physical presence forces me to focus on his absence.

Life happens (and death happens)

Reddy (or Not)

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